Babies All In The News..

Beloveds, babies have been all up in the news-do u hear me?

Let's start with the good, ok babies?

Ok now...first up we have lil' man, whose name is Jericho Scott...has been told he cannot play baseball bcuz he pitches too fast.

Too fast? Well hell, maybe those otha chirren are too devilish slow! I'dda think thats a reflection of the coach nurturin' Jericho's God-given gift!

When an opposing team found out lil Jericho was going to pitch, they packed and defaulted the game!

heeeeee heeeeee that's a funny right there!

It's not that baby's fault he pitches at a speed of 40mph! TELL IT TO GAWWWDDD!!


http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/images/deadspin/2008/08/JerichoScott.jpg

Jericho, Faux Maya has this to say:

You have the name, You have the gift-NOW TEAR THOSE WALLS DOWN!!!!

amen? amen. please don't make Granny Faux Maya put the preachin' hat on. It's only Tuesday, babies.

Next up is the bad.

Dr. Dre...city of Compton, Dr. Dre (yeah Granny Faux Maya, knows about him) and family are mourning the loss of their 20y/o son, Andre Jr.

Goodness gracious, me-o-my.

This little angel was found unconscious in their home. Can you imagi honey, Faux Maya's head just don't want to go there.

Never the less, we will offer the all the prayers, love and support that is needed during this trying time. *gonna lay dowwwwwnnn my burden, down by the river side, down by the river side, down by the river side, i'm gonna lay dowwwwwn my burden, (2x's) ain't gonna study war no mo') Yes lawd. Yes lawd. yes lawd.

nothin' more sadder than buryin' ur baby.

Unless we're getting to the Ugly part of this post.

smh

And these two need to just go on up and bury their careers. Who is Mz. Faux Maya talkin' about?

Mz. Faux Maya's talking about those two pitiful knuckle heads who had an audience in Australia and came off looking like a plum fool. O u still don't know?

Well one of 'em put their dirty lil wretched hands on my baby Mary J. Blige...mmmmhmmm that's right.

Those little bad cartoon character looking kids K.C. and Jo-Jo.

Mz. Faux Maya is wonderin' to herself ...what could've gone wrong with these babies that would cause their lives to be in such turmoil.

I believes they r smoking some of that whacky tobacky or worse.

that didn't look like no epipleppy to me.

My cuz Cornbread in Mississippi had Epileppy and ohhhh it was a sight to be seen.

We'd be out there pickin' cotton, or green beans-dependins on the season, and the next thing u knows, Cornbread is shaking and shivering like a laid out Elvis impersonator, right in the middle of Big Mama's veggey-tables!

ohhhh we were more worried about those corn stalks and tomatoes than ole Cornbread!

we'd just turn him on his side, stick a cob a-corn in his mouth and carry on. After a spell, he'd come around and help us finish pickin'.

So understand Mz. Faux Maya has had up close eckspear-e-ince with Epileppy. Does this look like Epileppy to you??


Those boys need to come and sit under my Uncle Cooder.

He'll cure what ails 'em.

I'm not going to tell his business. It's a well known fact once you tell Uncle Cooder's business, you're neva seen again. And I'll have too many people missing, Mz. Faux Maya.

That's all I have for you today, babies.

I'll be talking to you directly.

Faux Maya loves you, u hear?

You too, KC and Jo-Jo!


Until next time: may your heart and soul stir as a pot of grits! For I am, f.k.a. Big MaMa

1 comments:

Regina said...

I saw that little boy on TV yesterday. Poor thing. I say let him play with the big boys since the little babies think he throws too fast.

My prayers go out to Dre and family.

And I have nothing to say about that KC & JoJo mess...except, they need to go sit down somewhere!